Quotes by Joan Rivers

"I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, ``Get the hell off my property.'"

By Joan Rivers

"There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl."

By Joan Rivers

"I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them."

By Joan Rivers

"I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking."

By Joan Rivers

"Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly -- hurt, bitterness, grief and, m"

By Joan Rivers

"A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp."

By Joan Rivers

"The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it."

By Joan Rivers

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