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"We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the mental institution of the universe."
By Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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"Why is it that we entertain the belief that for every purpose odd numbers are the most effectual?"
By Pliny the Elder
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"Women remember the first kiss, men remember the last."
By Unknown
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"Where do I find the time for not reading so many books?"
By Karl Kraus
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"Would I had phrases that are not known, utterances that are strange, in new language that has not been used, free from repetition, not an utterance which has grown stale, which men of old have spoken."
By Egyptian Inscription Recorded at the Time of the Invention of Writing
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"War will never cease until babies begin to come into the world with larger cerebums and smaller adrenal glands."
By H. L. Mencken
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"Whenever we read the obscene stories, the voluptuous debaucheries, the cruel and torturous executions, the unrelenting vindictiveness, with which more than half the bible is filled, it would seem more consistent that we called it the word of a demon than the Word of God. It is a history of wickedness that has served to corrupt and brutalize mankind."
By Thomas Paine
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"Worry does not empty tomorrow of sorrow - it empties today of strength."
By Corrie ten Boom
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"Women are cursed, and men are the proof."
By Rosanne Barr
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"Women with pasts interest men... they hope history will repeat itself."
By Mae West
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"Warning signs that lover is bored:
1. Passionless kisses
2. Frequent sighing
3. Moved, left no forwarding address."
By Matt Groening
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"Why yes - a bulletproof vest."
By James Rodges, a murderer, on his final request before the firing squad
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"We all live in the protection of certain cowardices which we call our principles."
By Mark Twain
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"Water generally flows downhill in this area."
By Bob Bennett, WDIV News 4, Detroit, reporting on a flood that destroyed some suburban basement apartments.
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"Whenever you fall, pick up something"
By Oswald Theodore Avery
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"We gladly feast on those who would subdue us ... not just pretty words, Fester."
By Morticia Addams - from the Addams Family movie
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"With just enough of learning to misquote."
By Lord Byron
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"Whoever in discussion adduces authority uses not intellect but memory."
By Leonardo da Vinci
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"We have to remember that what we observe is not nature in itself but nature exposed to our method of questioning."
By Werner Heisenberg
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"What happens depends on our way of observing it or on the fact that we observe it."
By Werner Heisenberg
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