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"Fine art and pizza delivery, what we do falls neatly in between!"
By David Letterman
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"For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would be dropped to be replased either by "k" or "s", and likewise "x" would no longer be part of the alphabet. The only kase in which "c" would be retained would be the "ch" formation, which will be dealt with later. Year 2 might reform "w" spelling, so that "which" and "one" would take the same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish "y" replasing it with "i" and Iear 4 might fiks the "g
j" anomali wonse and for all.

Jenerally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear with Iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and Iears 6-12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and unvoist konsonants. Bai Iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez "c", "y" and "x" -- bai now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderez -- tu riplais "ch", "sh", and "th" rispektivli.

Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud
hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld."
By Mark Twain, "A Plan for the Improvement of English Spelling"
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"Feminism is the radical concept that women are people."
By Cheris Kramarae & Paula Treichler
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"For the things we have to learn before we can do them, we learn by doing them."
By Aristotle, Nichomachean Ethics
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"First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do."
By Epictetus
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"Finance is the art of passing money from hand to hand until it finally disappears."
By Robert W. Sarnoff
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"Fear makes strangers of people who should be friends."
By Shirley MacLaine
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"For what are posessions but things we guard for fear we might need them tomorrow?"
By Kahlil Gibron, (book) The Profit
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"Free your mind, and the rest will follow. Be colorblind, don?t be so shallow."
By En Vogue, Free Your Mind
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"Fear can keep us up all night long, but faith makes one fine pillow."
By Philip Gulley
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"From what we get, we can make a living; what we give, however, makes a life."
By Arthur Ashe
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"First make yourself unpopular, then people will take you seriously."
By Konrad Adenauer, 1876-1967
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"For a true writer each book should be a new beginning where he tries again for something that is beyond attainment. He should always try for something that has never been done or that others have tried and failed. Then sometimes, with great luck, he will succeed."
By Ernest Hemingway, in his Nobel Prize acceptance speech
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"Farmers are the only indispensable people on the face of the earth."
By Ambassador Li Zhaoxing, PRC, Idaho Grain, Fall 2000, p.8
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"For rarely are sons similar to their fathers: most are worse, and a few are better than their fathers."
By Homer, The Odyssey
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"Forsake not an old friend; for the new is not comparable to him: a new friend is as new wine; when it is old, thou shalt drink it with pleasure."
By Bible, Old Testament
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"Familiarity breed contempt."
By Aesop, The Fox and the Lion
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"Fine words and an insinuating appearance are seldom associated with true virtue."
By Confucius, The Confucian Analects
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"For God hates utterly
The bray of bragging tongues."
By Sophocles, Antigone
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"Force has no place where there is need of skill."
By Herodotus, The Histories of Herodotus
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